Gossip Girl is back...sort of

The CW soap "Gossip Girl" returns to the air at 8 p.m. Monday after a long absence. That's probably a mixed blessing to the many of you who have found this season a bit uneven. Personally, I agree there's been a lot to loathe this season (yes, Aaron Rose and Agnes the Skanky Model, I'm talking to you), but I'm still on board, due mainly to the often hilarious dialogue and some brilliantly sleazy storylines, such as Dan and Serena sharing a sibling and Lily's legitimately horrifying near-rape by Chuck's creepy uncle. And, of course, there's the ceaseless brilliance of Leighton Meester's performance as Blair Waldorf. Even in the worst GG episodes, the Blair stuff always shines.
But, I'm thinking that the two new episodes will perk up some of you who have been moaning that the show is losing its sheen. I've seen them and, while there's nothing quite as awesome as Chuck showing up drunk to his dad's funeral and calling his stepmom a whore, they're both pretty decent. First of all, it looks like two much-hated storylines are coming to a close (I won't spoil you by saying which ones, but I will predict that many of you will be pleased). Also, we see Blair fall apart a bit, which I think we can agree is always good for the show, as our Queen B is never quite so lovable -- and so vicious -- as when she's backed into a corner. And, best of all, in this Monday's episode, we see Nelly Yuki in a fat suit. Yes, you read that correctly. I won't reveal why exactly (quick hint: It has to do with why Blair is dressed like a Victorian widow in the above photo), but suffice it to say that that image alone makes the episode worth watching.
I know many "Gossip Girl" fans are worried about an upcoming reunion between two characters (no, I won't say which ones), but that reunion starts in next week's episode and, so far, I'm hating it a lot less than I thought I would.
Overall, the new episodes are fun and give me hope for the rest of the season.
"Gossip Girl" airs Monday at 8 p.m.

McShane rules in "Kings"...but can't quite save it

Often, I wake up in the middle of the night missing Al Swearengen. I do. I miss his gravelly voice, his ruthlessness tinged with vulnerability, and the way he masterfully manipulated profanity, decorating his speech with curse words with the carefully precision of a housewife placing throw pillows meticulously on a sofa. Yet Al, great as he was, would have been nothing without Ian McShane, who played him for three years on the HBO drama "Deadwood." The burly actor portrayed Al's violence, rage and surprising moments of tenderness with such grace, power and conviction that, when I heard the actor was returning to television, I got all giddy.
Alas, Silas Benjamin, the character McShane plays on the bizarre new NBC drama "Kings" is no Al Swearengen. And the show, which premieres at 8 p.m. Sunday on NBC with a two-hour pilot, is no "Deadwood."
It's not that "Kings" is bad, exactly, it's just...strange. It's based on the story of King David, and tells of an alternate reality in which King Silas Benjamin (McShane) rules over his country, which I think is located somewhere in America (but I can't be sure). This nation is at war with another nation and soldiers fighting in that war include Benjamin's son Jack (Sebastian Stan) and the humble but brilliant David Shepherd (Christopher Egan). David is heroic in battle, and becomes the darling of King Benjamin, who sees him as a surrogate for his own disappointing son. I got sort of confused by all the details of the scenario, but I absorbed enough to know that "Kings" is pretty ambitious in its goals. It seems to be making comments about monarchy, the influence of corporations on war, the sacrifices men (and women) make for power, and a whole bunch of stuff.
I admire the show's vision, and some elements of the production, including its sweeping photography, and the performance of McShane, who never disappoints. But there's something so stilted about the pilot. In fact, I might have actually liked the show better had it been a little worse. There are moments when it seems to be just this side of campy, with some truly pulpy dialogue ("War asks the heart to freeze at room temperature"), some fairly corny imagery (wait until you see the last shot of the pilot) and enough latent homoerotic tension to fill eight gladiator movies (what is UP with the way Eamonn Walker's character stares at David?). If it had gone just a little bit further in that direction, it might be more fun and enjoyable.
Though NBC sent me the pilot and two more episodes, I only had time to watch the pilot. So, perhaps "Kings" improves and finds its rhythm later on. But, right now, the show has little going for it, other McShane's performance. And even that made me keep thinking that I'd rather be watching "Deadwood."
"Kings" premieres 8 p.m. Sunday on NBC.

"24" and the silent clock of doom

The following post contains a MAJOR spoiler about last night's episode of "24." If you haven't seen the episode yet, please avert your eyes.
I guess you don't know what you've got 'till it's gone.
Last night, the time clock on "24," which is always silent following the death of a major character, went quiet yet again. This time, its victim was none other that Bill Buchanan (James Morrison), former CTU director and leader of this season's rag tag band of disgraced former government employees. Poor Bill threw himself in the line of some explosives to help derail a terrorist attack -- and to keep Jack Bauer from plunging into the dynamite himself.
Sigh.
You know, I've been pretty hard on old Bill, mocking how, despite constant reassurances from everyone in his life that he's great at his job, he is ALWAYS getting people killed. And yeah, I've poked a little fun at his newly suave look this season, with the stubble, and the long-ish hair and the cat burglar turtleneck. But you know, I'll miss him. I'm not sure why, but this is the magic of "24." We can rail against it, say it's right-wing propaganda, say that its plots are ridiculous and its characters are cardboard cutouts -- yet, on the last score at least, we're wrong. I'm surprised by how much I care about many of the characters on "24." And, while Bill's death isn't up there with Teri's or Michelle's or even poor Edgar's, it was sad nonetheless. So goodbye, Bill Buchanan. "24" fans will mourn your death -- even as we hope it allows us a chance to find out just what happened to your wife, Karen Hayes, who hasn't been mentioned at all this season.
Seriously, where is she?

Motivated sellers: The return of "Breaking Bad"

One of the many, many, crummy effects of last year's writers' strike is that it cut short the first season of AMC's dark, bizarre and brilliant new drama "Breaking Bad." The show centered on Walt (Bryan Cranston, a million miles away from his role as the goofy dad on "Malcolm in the Middle"), a former scientist and current chemistry teacher who discovers he has terminal lung cancer. Determined to leave a nest egg for his family (which includes the unborn child his wife is carrying), he teams up with a former student to become a crystal meth dealer. As a result, he finds himself using his considerable brain to make life or death decisions, all while his body continues to betray him. The first season only lasted seven episodes, but that was enough to earn Cranston a 2008 Emmy as best dramatic actor.
Now, the show has returned for a second season, which starts at 10 tonight on AMC. I've seen the first three episodes and, while there are some rough spots (mostly involving Walt's relationship with his wife), it remains one of the best shows on TV. When we rejoin Walt and his meth-dealing cohort Jesse (Aaron Paul), they have just gone into business with a ruthless, insane drug lord (Raymond Cruz, in a huge departure from his role as Sanchez on "The Closer"), and realize their lives are in danger.
The result is a dizzying set of episodes that manage to be harrowing and deeply funny at the same time. One of this show's great assets is that it always finds the dark humor in Walt's situation. A sequence in which Walt and Jesse are holed up with the drug kingpin and his ill uncle, watching cartoons and plotting the drug lord's death, is both scary and absurd. It's sort of like a Coen brothers' film, without all the mannerisms and with a lot more emotion.
And, while the show clearly lives or dies on Cranston's performance, the actors surrounding him are quite good as well, particularly Dean Norris as Walt's DEA agent brother-in-law, Hank. Since the protagonist of the story is a drug dealer, "Breaking Bad" could have turned Hank into a brainless cowboy. Instead, the character -- while definitely a cowboy -- is as sympathetic as Walt. He cares about his family and his job, and he's actually quite a competent DEA Agent. One of the main reasons he hasn't unearthed Walt's secret identity is that Hank underestimates his brainy brother-in-law. But that could change.
Presumably, the second season will be a bit longer than the first, allowing this series to flesh out its story and characters. I hope so. This is a daring, intelligent show that deserves to tell its story.
"Breaking Bad" airs at 10 tonight on AMC.

"Lost" recap: Michelle Dessler lives!

So, there were a lot of amazing moments on last night's episode of "Lost" -- the discovery that the left-behinds were stuck in the 1970s; the complete meltdown of Daniel Faraday; the gang's assimilation into Dharma culture; Juliet and Sawyer's romance; Sawyer's odd decision to use a girly pseudonym, etc. But maybe the best part of it all was the introduction of a new character, Amy, played by Reiko Aylesworth, whom I will always know as Michelle Dessler on "24." Sigh. I really miss her on "24," don't you? She really humanized Tony.
Anyway, back to "Lost." Not only did we get the revival of Reiko/Michelle, we also got a brief appearance by "Mad Men's" Jimmy Barrett (aka Patrick Fischler), a little background on the Other/Dharma tension that will eventually result in mass genocide, and a pretty awesome inside joke for the fans.
Let's dig into recapping episode eight of season five, "LaFleur."
When the episode starts, Sawyer, Juliet, Miles and Jin are where we left them, hovering slack-jawed around a rope stuck in the ground -- a rope that once had John Locke at the end of it. Then, we see Locke push the donkey wheel for, like, the millionth time, and cut back to the islanders. Another flash. When the flash subsides, the well appears to have come back but, when Sawyer attempts to jump in, he finds that it's only half-built. Whanh-Whanh. After his embarrassing actions, he and his gang find their headaches have subsided. The flashing has stopped. Their adventures in time travel also seem to have stopped -- but when are they?
We then jump ahead three years and Herc from "Friday Night Lights" is in a Dharma station, wearing a Dharma uniform, and getting his groove on to Tony Orlando with some chickie when Jimmy Barrett busts in, freaking out. The monitors show erstwhile Dharma leader Horace Goodspeed drunk and blowing up trees. Sigh. Those wacky Dharm-ites, with the booze and the explosives. Jimmy and Herc decide they must find "LaFleur." They go to a Dharma house knock on the door and...it's Sawyer! Clean shaven! What's going on? He and Miles find Horace, and Sawyer takes him home to his wife, Amy, who is pregnant and, it seems, as patient with Horace as Michelle was with Tony (I'm sorry, but she'll always be Michelle. Forever. So get used to it). Michelle goes into labor and they head to the hospital.
Jump back three years again. Sawyer and co. head to the beach, and come upon two men with guns. The men have already shot another man and have a bag over a woman' head, ready to do the same to her. Sawyer intervenes and tells the guys to put down their weapons. They don't and Sawyer and Juliet take the men out. They then pull the bag off the woman's head...yep, it's Michelle/Amy. She freaks out, and insists they bury the gunmen and take the third dead guy, her husband, with them.
She wants to know who they are, Sawyer gives her a story about being shipwrecked, they head off and she tricks them into getting zapped with the electric fence.
Ok, around this time, I had some difficulty keeping track of the whole Three Years Forward/Three Years Back thing, so I'm just going to divide the rest of the recap into two sections.
Three Years Back
Sawyer wakes up on a couch in Horace's office. He tells Horace that his name is Jim LaFleur (seriously? LaFleur? Mr. Badass would really want to be known as "The Flower?" Questionable). Horace is suspicious that Sawyer and co. are "hostiles," aka Others -- island denizens with whom the Dharm-ites don't get along. Sawyer say that he and his people were looking for the wreck of the Black Rock. Horace say they need to leave on the submarine. Sawyer said he wants to wait for the rest of his people but Horace says no go. Shortly thereafter, Richard shows up, as we all knew he would. He tells Horace that he knows their "truce" was broken and wants blood. Horace denies they had anything to do with it. Sawyer confronts Richard and fesses up to killing the guys, but points out that, since he isn't with Dharma, the truce wasn't broken. By the way, he says, did you bury that bomb? Oh, and I know that crazy bald man who came into your camp 20 years ago and said he was your leader. Richard is impressed, but he still takes the body of Amy/Michelle's husband. Horace, pleased with Sawyer's quick thinking, grants him two more weeks on the island.
Three Years Forward
The gang is still on the island. Michelle's baby is breech and the doctor doesn't know what to do. Sawyer hunts down Juliet, now working as a mechanic (?). She protests at first, but Sawyer tells her that the time they're in is so long ago, the island might not yet be a killer of moms and babies. She goes, and delivers the baby. It and its mom are fine. We also learn that Sawyer and Juliet are playing house now, and the appear to really care for each other. Uh-oh. This will could get ugly when Kate arrives. Meanwhile, Sawyer goes to Horace, now married to Amy/Michelle, and asks him why he got drunk. He found Amy's husband's necklace among her things, he explains. She isn't over him -- how could she be? It's only been three years. Sawyer/LaFleur explains how he got over a woman in three years, and Horace comforted. Then, Jin calls Sawyer to tell him that he's found Kate and company. Sawyer lies to Juliet and takes off. So much for being over Kate.
Highlights and notes:
* In between the episodes two flashes, we get a brief glimpse of the four-toed statue again...then it disappears and is not mentioned for the rest of the episode. Oh "Lost," how you tease.
* Three years forward Jin speaks perfect(ish) English, which makes sense. He's been around English speakers for a while now, so it seems reasonable he'd grasp the language.
* Great inside joke: Sawyer refers to Richard as "your friend with the eyeliner!" Ha! See, there were rumors that Nestor Carbonell (who plays Richard) was wearing eyeliner in his scenes. The rumor became so prevalent that the show's writers and producers have actually stepped forward to deny it.
* I've pointedly avoided mentioning Daniel, because I wanted to save him for last. First, what happened to Charlotte's body? Do the dead not travel in the flashes? And where was he during the three years forward scenes? We didn't see him. Is he already on the construction crew? Also, did he really see young Charlotte in the Dharma camp, or is just losing it big time?
* When Daniel declares that the time travel has stopped, he uses the metaphor of the stuck record again. Now that the travel has ceased "The record has stopped spinning." During this line, the camera spins around the circle of islanders. Nice effect.
* Just as last week's episode was a showcase for Terry O'Quinn, this was a centerpiece for Josh Holloway, who did an excellent job portraying Sawyer's nascent leadership. We saw him evolve believably from the rough and tumble skeptic to the smooth con man, ready to the play the part he needed to play in order to survive. Holloway has been underused lately, and it's nice to see him in the spotlight.

So long, Spaceman

Unofficial word came down today that ABC would not give a second season to its promising freshman series "Life on Mars," starring Jason O'Mara as Sam Tyler, a modern cop who finds himself transported back to 1973 after getting hit by a car. Though I can't say I'm stunned by the news (ratings for the series weren't great), it saddens me nonetheless. "Life on Mars," a remake of a well-received BBC miniseries, wasn't groundbreaking television, but it was fun and charming. It also had a wonderfully over-the-top performance from Harvey Keitel as gruff police Lt. Gene Hunt. In fact, one of the saddest things about the cancellation of "Mars" is that I won't get to see Keitel on my TV every week. I'll also miss seeing Michael Imperioli (who plays another rough and tumble cop) and his fabulous, 70's-era 'stache. And I'll miss the show's excellent use of '70s music. And I'll miss Gretchen Mol's sweetness and pluck as a brainy policewoman. Sigh. I'll miss a lot of things.
However, there is a silver lining to this cloud. Sources say that the decision not to renew "Mars" came early enough that the show's creative team will be able to provide it with a proper ending, explaining just why and how Sam ended up in the past and, possibly, bringing him back to the present. That's a relief, considering that many canceled shows (including another series with "Mars" in the title) get their death notice after their last episodes have been filmed, often leaving major plot threads unresolved.
Glad that fans of "Life on Mars" will at least get some closure.
The other bright spot is that the original British "Life on Mars" will be released on DVD in July, giving fans of the American version who haven't seen it (including yours truly) a chance to view it.
It doesn't totally take away the sting of losing a solid show, but at least it softens the blow.

Running with the Devil

I love Satan.
Oh, well, not the actual, biblical fire and brimstone Satan.
No, I'm referring to the quippy, charming well-dressed version of the Prince of Darkness played by Ray Wise on the CW's lovable, if uneven, horror comedy "Reaper." When the series debuted last season, it was one of the standouts of the freshman class. It focused on the adventures of young Sam (Bret Harrison), who finds out at the age of 21 that his parents sold his soul to the devil when he was a baby. The devil (Wise) comes to collect, making Sam his own personal bounty hunter, returning escaped souls to hell. The pilot was bright, funny and smart, with a standout performance by Wise.
If subsequent episodes weren't quite as good, they were still charming diversions, with Wise dependably hilarious as one of the wittiest devils in pop culture. Harrison was also good, believably befuddled and easy to root for, and he had great rapport with Wise. Tyler Labine was a love him or hate him presence as Sam's obnoxious best bud Sock, but I found him funny, and liked the relationship between them and their third friend, Ben (Rick Gonzalez). The show was a pleasant, if undemanding, way to spend an hour.
The show's second season starts Tuesday at 8 p.m. and, while it still isn't a slam dunk, the episode is a strong one, with Sam coming to grips with the fact that he might be devil's son. This new aspect to their relationship adds a nice friction to the scenes between Wise and Harrison, and Wise delivers a fairly creepy speech in which he informs Sam that there are no real benefits to being the Son of Satan.
In other developments, Sam's love interest. Andy (Missy Peregrym), wants to end things and Sock finds out that his mom's new husband has a hot daughter his age who is SO excited about having a big brother. Ouch.
Add in a fight club of escaped souls, Sock's frightening list of nicknames for himself (e.g. Sock Puppet and Johann Sebastian Sock), and the always-welcome use of Joe "Bean" Esposito's 80's classic "You're the Best," and you have a pretty solid hour.
Reaper airs 8 p.m. Tuesday on the CW.